More Doubledecker stories

Personally i think it is high time i gave up on the buses and walked everywhere!
as i cant afford to buy a car and drive it to central london!...and forget i no fit ride bicycle in this london... do i want to die young? Nooooooooo! okay no more buses... i will walk from now on! and if you are wondering why i'm making this strange resolution half way into january... listen to tory!

Today i sat jejely in the upper deck, not my favourite front-of-the-bus-tourist seat (refer to doubledecker toaster if you are wondering) but just a good window seat where i could look down on what was available of the world.

But someone caught my eye, a young brown eyed lady... on second thoughts no be lady... woman... girl... wharrever, in a black coat, grey jeans, black socks, gold shoes, purple cardigan and red gloves! sitting across the aisle from me. Now it is not the colour clashing ensemble that I found amazing (that's pretty normal around here, e no dey shock me again) but what she was doing.

She brought out a huge compact mirror (nothing compact about it) from her blue bag and openned it in her lap, then she licked her finger and rubbed it on the side of her nose. (okay now - i thought). then she stuck the finger into her mouth again and brought out a little more wet stuff and rubbed on her cheek! ahah! this mofo dey take saliva baff inside bus?
then she repeated the action, and rubbed on her upper lip! this oloriede kept this up till i got off the bus - 7 stops later... she kept rubbing saliva over a little bit of her face one at a time... meticulously!

What is all this na! early morning like this?...dem chase you commot for house you no get chance baff?... if you wan baff you no fit buy bottled water?...

Ah ha! ito! saliva! on your face! eranko ni mofo yi (this mofo is an animal) to say i was disgusted was an understatement yet i managed to laugh uproariously before i got off the bus....

Madness!

Like i said before i no dey take double decker again!

MAKEUP 101 – Making the best of your looks (Part 2)

Eye Makeup

Hello Sistas,
How did your practice with part 1 go?... was it useful.. did you understand it?... do let me know how it went... so now on to Part 2
Personally I find eye makeup (eyeliner, eyeshadow, and mascara) the most fun type of makeup and I would say it is the part I’d rather not do without.

Eyeliner: Eyeliner belongs on the base of your lids, and its purpose is to enhance the size and shape of your eyes. Some people also like to line the bottom of their eyes, which really has a dramatic effect.
It comes in many different colours and forms, including pencil and powder (ideal for a "natural" look), and cake and liquid (for a more "dramatic" look). Any colour would do if pencil or powder as long as you can blend. However for the liquid and cake I’d say stick with black or brown (maybe I am conservative though).
When lining your lid with the liquid liner, you may choose to line only the upper lid, but do finish the line. Lining just half of the eye has a minimizing effect which can also be off.
Start lining from the inside of your lid and continue along the entire lash line to the outermost corner for your right eye, and start from the outside and draw the line inward for your left eye – this is if you are right handed. It is of course vice versa if you are left handed.
Extending your black liquid liner beyond the outside corner of your eyes however is a No No! It will only give you a harsh outdated look, brown liner drawn a bit past the eye is okay.

Eyeshadow: Eyeshadow goes on each entire lid and sometimes in the space between your lids and your eyebrows.
It comes in a variety of colours and also several different forms, including cream (good for dry skin), matte (good for oily skin), and pencil (good for all types of skin).
Your blusher should not double as eye –shadow (I bet I caught you there).
It's almost never a good idea to match your eye shadow colour to your eye colour it would have no effect at all; in general, colours that contrasts with eye colour work better.

Mascara: Mascara only used to be available in black, but nowadays you can find it in all sorts of colours, so while black mascara was used for the sole purpose of making your eyelashes stand out without calling attention to the fact that you have mascara on, coloured mascara is now used to make a bold statement. If you choose coloured mascara, I’d recommend that you stick to darker colours like navy blue or brown, forget sky blue, green and such, they are just too unnatural.
Mascara comes in a wand with a tube; there are straight wands, and there are curved wands however I have been unable to differentiate much in the effect offered by both shapes.
The best way to achieve thick lashes is to do several thin coats of mascara. If you experience clumping, wipe the excess mascara from your brush with a tissue.
Don’t jab your mascara into the tube so savagely…just take it nice and slow… push it in… turn it around a few times… there… you are ready to sweep your lashes!

P.S – Do have your eyebrows professional shaped (a large number of beauty salons now offer this service. You can then maintain the eyebrow yourself.

Hope to hear from you on your experiments and practice with Makeup 101 (Part 1 and 2)

MAKEUP 101 – Making the best of your looks (Part 1)

Facial Makeup

Everyday I go out, to work, church, socials, I see women wearing the wrong makeup,slapping it on like cement, too little or too much, too dark or too light. Frankly i am tired of seeing women with two eyebrows over one eye, the natural and the drawn or black haired women with red eyebrows(red, WTF!) and today my fashionista /makeup artist side has had enough.

I am giving the sistas a quick one in capitalising on their looks. (Yes I moonlight as a makeup artist, so just in case you are getting married and need the services of a good one, now you know)

P.S forget that old wife’s tale that you look better without it… you sure look great without makeup but you can enhance your best features with makeup… else you can as well say you look better without your bra or maybe your jewellery…lol… natural eh?

I’ll start with the basics and I have written it in the order I personally think makeup should be applied.
Make up is a wide topic so this topic will be coming in three parts…
• Facial makeup
• Eye makeup
• Lip makeup & Blush

Facial makeup (concealer, foundation, and powder) was invented to make your skin look flawless. Nobody has flawless skin all the time and if you do just go ahead to the part 2 of this topic. As for the rest of us (and we at 99.99% are the majority) the list below details what facial makeup is most suitable for each skin type (now I’m assuming we all know our skin types!)
• Dry skin: Liquid or Cream
• Dry skin to normal : Liquid or Cream
• Normal to Oily: Oil-free liquid or Powder
• Oily skin: Oil-free liquid with a matte finish
• Combination skin: Liquid, Cream, or Powder (whatever balances your face)

Concealer (optional): also called cover stick is the first thing you apply to your face. I said optional because it’s for spot/blemish treatment. You can skip this and go on straight to the foundation, however, it’s a great one for hiding baggy or sunken eyes, eye circles, most blemishes (I have said most cos you shouldn’t use this to forcefully hide an angry pimple… you have to do something to pacifier an angry pimple, say the night before (a little red toothpaste, a drop of lime or something), for the concealer to hide it well).
The concealer comes in liquid bottles and tubes (which are thinner and good for drier skin), and sticks and compacts (which are thicker and good for oilier skin). Choose a concealer that is slightly lighter than your regular skin colour - the foundation that you apply over it will even it out.

Foundation: You need to invest in a good foundation. Don’t go for something you would find in a drugstore, you need to keep in mind that it is going to be covering your entire face and affect everything else you put on.
Find one that won't clog your pores and will lay evenly – the whole purpose of this endeavor is to even out your skin's tone and texture. With this kind of product, you generally get what you pay for, so it's worth it to shell out extra – foundations by Clinique, IMAN and Mary Kay, the MAC foundation, studio fix and liquid powder are tested and proven. Black Opal foundation is an affordable and dependable one too.
When picking out a foundation, please, please get the color that's closest to your own skin colour. Now if you ignore this advice, you are going to look funny and annoying! Like a female Michael Jackson or something. Test the foundation on your neck or face for a more accurate match, forget testing on your arm it won’t work.
Foundation comes in three types: liquid, cream, and powder. Make sure that your foundation is oil-based for dry skin, oil-free for oily skin, and water-based for combination skin.
When you apply foundation, cover your entire face, and don't leave mask lines - if you stop at your jawline, you'll have an obvious line between the makeup and your skin. So darlings blend, blend and blend!

Note: It is not mortar; don’t slap it on like you are plastering your wall.

Powder: Powder can be applied over foundation to help "set" it, but its main purpose is to help keep your face looking fresh as the day wears on.
Powder comes in the loose/pressed variant and you don’t have to get anything particularly expensive either (however not the dirt cheap clumpy types either)

That’s it for now, have fun and watch out for part 2!
And do get back to me on how you fare on your practice with Makeup 101 (part 1)…. I’m looking forward to hearing from you.

How to feel and look like a Prince

There is a thin barely visible line in the matter of a man’s clothes which somehow determines who is attractive, separating those worth taking a good look at and those who are not.
The moment a man sits on the side of the line downwards; the attention a woman gives him is minimal and will soon be lost unless he is by some means able to convince the particular female of the need for another chance.
The men who have the understanding of this; dress accordingly and seem innately successful with women; some even go further and dress such that they give a woman cause to study her own dressing and be gratified at her efforts, wish that she had paid more attention that morning or had more at her disposal to look better.
Bottom line - it doesn’t matter where you are or what do you, being well dressed and looking good can never be something that’s too much to ask!

So this one is especially for the guys – I’m pitching in to help my peeps get that look we die for!

• Look and smell clean - Go for a shave, wear deodorant / body spray/aftershave sparingly and check under your finger nails for dirt in the morning.
• Use the pressing iron – well ironed shirts and trousers always gives you a sharp look
• Your work wear should be elegant and formal; a couple of black, grey, khaki, and brown chinos would work fine when mixed and matched with a number of formal shirts. If you prefer formality and propriety over comfort and ease then go for the traditional pleated straight cut pants. In these cuts colours like navy blue, military green look flattering.
• Avoid shirts that have prominent patterns.
• And what ever you do, don’t repeat your shirts without a wash, we will notice that dirty collar.
• Pin-stripped shirts never go out of style.
• A plain crisp well-fitted shirt worn with pants that are tailor made and customized to your body forms an uncanny combo that can counter criticism from the Vogue magazine editor.
• Both your shirt and your tie cannot be busy at once. If your shirt is busy, keep the tie plain and vice versa
• TIES can be extremely hot if you wear them right; practice your knot till it’s perfect you should untie your tie regularly to iron out the wrinkles.
• For more important meetings make use of power dressing. Wearing a full suit for a meeting can make the right first impression. Keep the time of day and season in mind before picking out one.
• Make sure that your trousers are long enough to drape comfortably over the tops of your shoes without scraping the ground.
• As a rule of thumb, pinstriped dark coloured pants will make you look taller and thinner. To flaunt a broader upper body team them with a light coloured shirt.
• A belt is one accessory that can make or break the entire ensemble. Go with the basics for work wear; let your belt and shoes match.
• However, when you're partying there are no rules. Whatever your inner devil wants is fine. Do not hold back. Retro, contemporary or vintage all look perfect if you have the queer eye for picking up stuff.
• Choose your socks carefully, white/light socks with dark pants are unforgivable
• If you anticipate taking your shoes off at any point, make sure your socks are hole-free.
• Never wear sneakers to work! If your work place allows and you are thinking of comfort, wear smart Italian loafers in a dark colour, they are just as comfy as any other pair of sneakers but stylish as hell. Walk around as much as you want.
• Do not hesitate to wear shoes with heels if you are, well vertically challenged. Well-heeled shoes will make your pants seem more well cut.
• Linen, jeans, jerseys, polo tops, hooded tops and khakis all make good casual wear
• Please, please your boxers are underwear; they should never show at your waist.
• If you are not a rock star or any such thing avoid heavy gold chains or tufts of chest hair peeking out from beneath an opened shirt.
• While still on the casual lane, I say never wear your sunglasses when the sun is not out… and never in a night club…it is after all ‘night’!
• Always dress according to the event you are attending.
• And finally, if you try something on and you have to convince yourself that you like it, just put it back. It is not meant to be.