Tuesday, 10 July 2007

My Advert - I need a Boyfriend

I am tired of waiting for the right man to come to me…. I am tired of paying attention to seemingly right men who later prove me wrong…. I am interested only in the right individuals and after much deliberation I have decided to put up an advert so that only men who fit this profile… men o… no boys abeg… should apply within. This advert is valid for only 2 weeks after posting.

I need a nice young man who can hug and cuddle on demand… who will be available for bonding sessions – sessions spent together in my place, his place, and wherever catches our fancy, who is willing to seat through a few mushy movies, call and receive calls incessantly and at odd hours, not older than 35, single, not weird, no tattoos… minimal bad habits… no present or future gay tendencies and with manageable emphasis on s..x’…

15 comments:

jadedjune said...

sister....i feel you....nuff said!

Viavo said...

In addition,
All Applicants are expected to forward the following:

A detailed resume of previous relationships .If any kindly explain why it didnt work out.
If none, why?

A recent 5x7 photograph.

Kindly indicate if you are staying with your mama, on your own or a block of flats with your boys?

Current Employer (A recent copy of your payslip and bank statement would be very ok)

Anonymous said...

Dr. Roberts a 35yr old talk business executive based in Lagos needs a tall slim fair & busty lady of 23 to 27 years for a serious relationship that will lead to marriage. r u interested? call 08066185040

Anonymous said...

LAWL LAWL..you r d 2nd blooger to have man wanted as a current post!lawl

Anonymous said...

hear hear..Dr.roberts is interested

Tyger said...

@jadedjune
thanks

@rotex
would that make you an applicant or an external consultant... let's allow the applicants come in first before we present them with this extra list...
@drroberts
Dear Applicant, thanks for your prompt response to my advert.Your application will be treated accordingly.In the meantime,please refer to additional requirements by Rotex.

@PinkSatin

who is this other smart blogger?... do tell...and yes Drroberts is being attended to..lol

ziariz said...

babe, sorry this is coming late..but i totally feel you on this..lol about the manageable emphasis on s..x...i like that, the cuddling part is a real plus also.. not afraid of emotions, showing that he loves you, can not play mind games, is able to open up when he has things on his mind, is not afraid of love and all that.. if wishes were horses... but i am positive that he is around the corner..no need to squint any more trying to find him... he'll find you soon... and the annoying cliche which i must add... love is just around the corner..

bArOquE said...

@Dr.Bob, competition has arrived so toughen up
@tyger, ok oh, look no further//i work too hard & cherish my sleep so i cant promise odd hour calls//memorable bonding sessions i guarantee//almost, no tattoos//i dont particularly emphasize on s..x, i believe in action
@rotex, i dont only live on my own, own my flat//you sure you have enough paper to print my bank statements...make you no divert tyger customers oh

Tyger said...

@ziariz
thanks sista... e go berra

@baroque
you must maintain a decent competitive spirit, so pls desist from threatening fellow contestants.. abi!
almost no tattoo means there is one hidden somewhere?... last time i checked s..x was an action...so your unparticular emphasis has a fishy ring to it ...lol... however, you can still send in your application as tyger is planning to execute equal opportunity employment...lol...LMAO

NikkiSab said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
UnNaked Soul said...

Am I L8????
lol

Tyger said...

Dear Unnaked,

There might be a special concession for you, if you show promise... however you need to send in your application first..lol.. howdy?

rethots said...

Hmmm.......why does it feel "....and not younger than me" is missing?

Interesting stats though.

Tyger said...

@rethots
and not younger than me is missing cos that doesnt count or does it? lol

doll (retired blogger) said...

good things come to they that wait..see 2 yrs later u are trying wedding gowns